E mbarking on a new relationship can be daunting – especially if you’ve been hurt in the past. Previous experience can leave you with a multitude of expectations, heavily influencing how you approach any new love interest.
Whilst it’s good to know what you want out of a relationship, and what you do or don’t like, allowing previous experience to tarnish future relationships may be detrimental. Focussing on past disappointments and hurt can be a way to avoid repeating the same mistakes, but it can also result in experiencing varying levels of anxiety in the the early stages of a relationship, which can ruin an otherwise happy time and get in the way of getting to know someone new.
Below are some simple tips that can help new couples who are starting out in a new relationship.
1. Take It Slow
When entering a new relationship with someone you really like, it can be tempting to rush. Feelings of infatuation and falling for each other can be overwhelming, leading to making commitments that a little later down the track we may regret.
The need to make a relationship solid too soon often leads to disappointment, as important stages, that are a natural progression of getting to know someone new, are rushed or even overlooked. Early indications of whether a relationship will succeed long term will be picked up if couples take the time to get to know each other slowly.
In order to do this, you’ll need to develop a little bit of emotional self discipline. Learn how to say no to a date every so often, in order to create some space. Be careful about jumping ahead too many steps before reflecting on whether you are really ready for this next stage.
Honesty is the best policy in this situation in order to avoid hurting someone’s feelings. If you like them, let them know you like them, but you want to to take it slow to give your relationship the best chance of succeeding. If you’ve had a tendency to rush into relationships in the past, this might be quite daunting at first, but you might just discover it is the secret to finding the right relationship.
2. Be Attentive
Especially important if you’ve had bad experiences in the past, staying focussed on what’s happening in the present and not letting past experiences colour your new relationship, will enhance your ability to get to know a new partner.
Just because a previous partner acted in a certain way doesn’t mean your new partner will be the same. Shannon Kolakowski, psychologist and author of “The Hidden Issue That Could Affect Your Relationship” stresses how important it is to be attentive to your new partner’s actions and feelings, and not allow events from the past to cloud your judgement and happiness.
3. Go Away Together
Whilst this may sound like a step too far for a new relationship, going away together to a new environment is actually a great way to assess your true compatibility as a couple and really get to know each other. This usually isn’t a hard ask as new couples relish the idea of escaping for a romantic getaway in a secluded location.
4. Ask Questions
The old saying “if you don’t ask, you’ll never know” is hugely important for new couples when it comes to nurturing their bond and getting to know each other.
If it’s early in a relationship and your new interest rarely asks you questions, it could be a warning sign showing that he or she is not really interested in you. Rarely asking questions doesn’t bode well when trying to understand each other and it won’t get you any closer to knowing whether or not you are compatible. Making the effort to ask about family, friends and interests is a normal part of the journey of any new relationship, as well as any ongoing, long-term relationship.
Discover Each Other With A Couples Romantic Getaway
For couples looking to experience a secluded, relaxing destination, visiting an area like the Dandenong Ranges is certain to provide the tranquillity and ambience needed to get to know each other on a deeper level.
Balinese Retreat is the ideal secluded, romantic escape specifically designed for romantic couples to spend quality time together. Surrounded by stunning scenery, set within a private 5-acres of land, and offering a choice of indulgent accommodation, hot springs and massage packages, Balinese Retreat is Melbourne’s best kept secret for adults and the ultimate getaway for a new relationship.